child at heart

umm.. so I was told on sunday (the 18th) by a dear friend that the money I still needed for Kenya (about $400) was covered, she had a check waiting for me in early June. OH MY GOSH! My mom laughed at me during that conversation because when Mrs. C said that I just said “ok” and kept going, it didn’t even register until my mom was like did you hear what she just said?? I took a moment to think about it and then it hit. I didn’t know what to think for a moment… it was a little overwhelming. The Lord sure does provide… in so many ways that I would have never known if it was not for this trip.

The Lord has already put it on my heart to do missions when I come home. I’ve already started looking at/praying about/and applying for some IMB (International Mission Board) opportunities. I told my mom just so she would already have a heads up – she just let out a big sigh and said “let me please get through this mission trip first” and she feels this way because all the missions I’ve looked into are long durations. (ie; Janurary 2009 through July 2009) That’s a bit longer than what I’m doing this summer but it already feels right. I’m still obviously in prayer about this and want to do the Lord’s will. For all I know God might not want me to do missions right now (after this trip, while I’m still in school), maybe He just wants me to step out on faith and apply and then be used later on in life. Either way I am applying and trying not to be disobedient and defiant in my home life.

On that note I also told my dad. I played through my head about a thousand times of how that conversation would go… and of course it was COMPLETLY opposite of what I imagined. Things quickly got defensive and uncomfortable between the two of us. I don’t want to go into too much detail – lets just put it as my mother and I have different views on school, missions and my young life than my father has. I’m trying to handle the situation rightly but am confused as to what I am supposed to do. Should I go ahead and finish my applications like I feel called to do, or should I put it off until I graduate college so my father will be happy? I feel so scatterbrained and confused to what would be the best thing to do.

I am so incredibly happy for my friends Dinah and Michael as they are on their way to get their children from Ethiopia. They have been on an incredibly long journey to get to this point and are ecstatic about having Dawit and Bereket in their arms within the end of the month. It brings tears of joy to my eyes for those children as well as the whole Stephens family. God’s love and grace will be shown to those children daily and I pray that this new journey will bring so much into those children’s lives each and every single day. I know they will have such Godly parents who are humble and live in the Word and in constant faith with their Creator. The Lord is going to grow that entire family so much, and I cannot wait to see where things go from here for them.

I am only 26 days away from being in Africa and I am a bit anxious/nervous/scared. I’ve been talking to my mentor and praying and trying to take me thoughts captive so I don’t go down that scary what if down spiral of thoughts. Please continue to pray for us and our thoughts and hearts as we get so much closer to this trip.