child at heart

Except in the cases of extreme conditions, like my crazy aunt and her 2
children, family is the basis of my life. For example, if I am faced
with the decision of spending time with a boyfriend or my mawmaw and
pawpaw… I hate to break it to you boyfriend but the fogies win
every time. I say all this because I have the privilege (for only a short
time left) to work with one of my older cousins and she is awesome. Her
husband and children are precious and I thank God for putting them into
her life. Yesterday at work we laughed like we were 10, had super immature moments
and some serious moments… and at the end of the night I felt like when we
were younger again. I miss not being as connected with my family now and
it made me have more of a desire to spend time with them all.

I wish I could spend more time with Courtney and her family, Brooke and Shawn and even my cousin Brent who is home from being overseas. Why do I say I wish I could? Because I am lazy and don’t make plans or try to do anything when it comes to seeing them. Now with Brooke and Shawn they live in one of the Carolina’s so I cant really drive up there to see them, but when it comes to Courtney and Brent I am just a lazy person and it saddens me so. I am going to try to start off the New Year with seeing them more often and becoming more involved with my family again.

On the note of family I desperately covet your prayers for my cousin Brooke and her husband Shawn .

Also on another kind of weird note, Ive been having dreams about dating this certain man from my church, and I do say man because I do believe he is around 40 years old. And what kind of freaks me out is that I have had SEVERAL dreams about being with him… and I am not sure if I enjoy these feelings…. HELP ME!!! My psychological talk comes out as “Well you know dreams are repressed feelings finding their way out in your subconscious mind… You are only having these dreams because you have not come to term with having these feelings for this man and you do not know how to accept it”, but then me when I am awake says “GROSS! He is so much older than you! And I am not sure its a good idea!!”…. so which do I listen to? Help me someone PLEASE!